tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17537576774422930152024-03-14T04:33:29.702-07:00Garram MasalaBlends well. A little intense at times. Use sparingly. It is what it is.Garram Masalahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05897014567351823389noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1753757677442293015.post-6564266081157580112011-12-10T05:55:00.000-08:002011-12-10T07:08:28.712-08:00Dreams<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMIdWH1yQzRCfzc2lLzB54OttpwJ0EgG-igCWbaWM44FxC_FV43r0XdehIA84fvqxbKXfz2HVBSqJi34fzeZL9TS4LMAlEyEeqaU4A5ofMCd9PI5zSgKAvr_jUyIUposrK9ajQbsrdhV8/s1600/Gustave_Dore_Inferno1.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 212px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMIdWH1yQzRCfzc2lLzB54OttpwJ0EgG-igCWbaWM44FxC_FV43r0XdehIA84fvqxbKXfz2HVBSqJi34fzeZL9TS4LMAlEyEeqaU4A5ofMCd9PI5zSgKAvr_jUyIUposrK9ajQbsrdhV8/s320/Gustave_Dore_Inferno1.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5684507208110559858" /></a><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">I've had a succession of vivid dreams recently which is a little weird as a couple of people at work have had the same. </span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">My layman understanding of oneirology goes as far as dreams hold no esoteric meaning. They are usually bourn out of feelings of restlessness, anxiety and fatigue. I don't feel unsettled. For the first time in a long period of searching and feeling out of sorts, I finally feel like I'm recovering or perhaps growing from a series of professional and personal challenges over the past couple of years. My lovely CL has been a source of great support and comfort, constantly reminding me that all clouds have silver linings, even the darkest ones. I found those words uplifting and heart warming especially as CL is a realist with a dash of cynicism, but nevertheless terribly unphilosophical. I also finally understand the luckiest amongst us who claim how lovely it is to be with someone who knows your neuroses, constant questioning, finds you terrible hard work for nagging and constantly testing the relationship but still loves you and choses to be with you every day. I have come to love CL and am grateful to have him as a companion in a city of bustling crowds, scrambling for late trains, intense one-off experiences, intercepted by a menagerie of mundane day-to-day living. My new job is going well, I'm finally working with Rob and refining my career path as well as saving for my first home which is going swimmingly well too. My confusion therefore, about these disturbing and vivid dreams led me to the www in order to research what the hell is going on. Perhaps 'hell' as a choice of word is rather unwise, considering I feel like I'm entering Dante's Inferno when I visit the strange and inexplicable world of my dreams. I know that people often have strange dreams, but I find it hard to believe how the mind can create stories which make no sense rationally, elicit strong emotions and lurk somewhere in a deep, dark place within the subconscious. Dreams have been studied since 4000 BC, the Greeks and Romans believed they were messages from God. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Of course any form of research conducted by a person with a pseudo-psychological instead of a religious bias is bound be trouble - Freud. All roads lead to Freud. Allegedly, the producer of the most prolific dream theories postulated that the succession of images, emotions and events which occur involuntarily in the mind during sleep are due to our inner most desires, often originating from childhood. The latent content reflects unexpressed, perhaps even unknown fantasies and desires. Oh deary, I sincerely hope not. I hate to think of myself as a boiling pot of unexpressed desires and fantasies, waiting to topple over. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">I'm no oneirologist , although perhaps will add it to never ending list of 'things to be when I'm grown up'. I decided to diligently keep a notebook on my bedside table in order to capture what I dreamt the night before, fearing the stories would be forgotten. A precautionary measure, as I mostly remember most of my dreams, even those I had as a 4 year old child. Elephant memory - a curse or a blessing depending on which way you look at it. I scanned my ramblings the night after Thursday, and this is what I dreamt:</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Mum, me and grandma in Greece. Lots of love and connection between us, I've always had a visceral connection to my grandma. We'd never visited before, although I recollected it as being strangely familiar. Hilly, dry heat, the sunset's reflection on the dark blue ocean reminiscent of my trip to Crete. I therefore felt like I'd been there before. Crete, I thought, we are in Crete. Mum and I visited a shop which sold honey, yoghurt, pistachios, almonds and baklava. I told mum that Greece produces the best honey in the world and we left the shop armed with a brown paper bag of shelled, uncharacteristically large pistachios and another filled with fresh honeycomb. Then, I'm not in Greece. I'm walking with my dad, grandpa and uncle down a red sanded, dusty road. We are walking past fences which often saw in Lenz, which housed violent, mouth-frothing, teeth-gnarling, red-eyed Rotweillers. I held my grandad's hand as I often did when I was younger and felt unsafe, and had a strong, sinking feeling of impending doom as we walked on. Out of nowhere, appeared a group of 20 demon-like people. They had jetblack long hair, reddish skin, and siamese eyes. The eyes were green, like a cat's. They stopped us and asked us if we were muslim. We said 'no', and they attacked us. Weird. I woke up feeling shaken.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">So....I sincerely hope that Freud is wrong. I have no fantasies of warding of green siamese eyed gypsies with black hair, thank you very much! I just hope that tonight, I visit Greece again. If I do, I'll make sure I eat baklava for breakfast, lunch and dinner. </span></div><div><br /></div>Garram Masalahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05897014567351823389noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1753757677442293015.post-14113929714172046552011-06-25T13:58:00.000-07:002011-06-25T14:06:35.760-07:00<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: 24px; font-family:sans-serif, serif;"><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:sans-serif;"></span></p><h1 id="firstHeading" class="firstHeading" style="color: black; background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; font-weight: normal; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.1em; margin-left: 0px; overflow-x: hidden; overflow-y: hidden; padding-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; border-bottom-width: 1px; border-bottom-style: solid; border-bottom-color: rgb(170, 170, 170); width: auto; font-size: 1.6em; line-height: 1.2em; background-position: initial initial; ">Hangover</h1><div id="bodyContent" style="font-size: 0.8em; position: relative; width: 790px; line-height: 1.5em; "><div id="siteSub" style="display: inline; font-size: 12px; font-weight: normal; ">From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia</div><div id="contentSub" style="font-size: 11px; line-height: 1.2em; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.4em; margin-left: 1em; color: rgb(125, 125, 125); width: auto; "></div><div class="dablink" style="font-style: italic; padding-left: 2em; margin-bottom: 0.5em; ">For other uses, see <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hangover_(disambiguation)" title="Hangover (disambiguation)" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">Hangover (disambiguation)</a></div><p style="margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypoglycemia" title="Hypoglycemia" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">Hypoglycemia</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dehydration" title="Dehydration" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">dehydration</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acetaldehyde" title="Acetaldehyde" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">acetaldehyde</a> <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Substance_intoxication" title="Substance intoxication" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">intoxication</a>, and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glutamine" title="Glutamine" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">glutamine</a> rebound are all theorized causes of hangover symptoms.<sup id="cite_ref-0" class="reference" style="line-height: 1em; font-weight: normal; font-style: normal; "><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hangover#cite_note-0" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; white-space: nowrap; background-position: initial initial; "><span>[</span>1<span>]</span></a></sup> Hangover symptoms may persist for several days after alcohol was last consumed. Approximately 25-30% of drinkers may be resistant to hangover symptoms.<sup id="cite_ref-1" class="reference" style="line-height: 1em; font-weight: normal; font-style: normal; "><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hangover#cite_note-1" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; white-space: nowrap; background-position: initial initial; "><span>[</span>2<span>]</span></a></sup> Some aspects of a hangover are viewed as symptoms of acute ethanol withdrawal, similar to the longer-duration effects of withdrawal from <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alcoholism" title="Alcoholism" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">alcoholism</a>, as determined by studying the increases in brain reward thresholds in rats (the amount of current required to receive from two electrodes implanted in the lateral <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypothalamus" title="Hypothalamus" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">hypothalamus</a>) following ethanol injection.<sup id="cite_ref-2" class="reference" style="line-height: 1em; font-weight: normal; font-style: normal; "><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hangover#cite_note-2" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; white-space: nowrap; background-position: initial initial; "><span>[</span>3<span>]</span></a></sup> Dehydration is caused by alcohol's ability to inhibit the effect of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vasopressin" title="Vasopressin" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">anti-diuretic hormone</a> on kidney tubules, which leads to a hyperosmolar state, which in turn causes shrinking of (by loss of water) the brain cells which causes hangover.<sup id="cite_ref-3" class="reference" style="line-height: 1em; font-weight: normal; font-style: normal; "><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hangover#cite_note-3" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; white-space: nowrap; background-position: initial initial; "><span>[</span>4<span>]</span></a></sup>A <b>hangover</b> (pronounced <span title="Pronunciation in the International Phonetic Alphabet (IPA)" class="IPA"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">/ˈhæŋoʊvər/</a></span>) describes the sum of unpleasant physiological effects following heavy consumption of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alcoholic_beverage" title="Alcoholic beverage" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">alcoholic beverages</a>. The most commonly reported characteristics of a hangover include <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Headache" title="Headache" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">headache</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nausea" title="Nausea" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">nausea</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Photophobia" title="Photophobia" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">sensitivity to light</a> and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phonophobia" title="Phonophobia" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">noise</a>,<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lethargy" title="Lethargy" class="mw-redirect" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">lethargy</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dysphoria" title="Dysphoria" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">dysphoria</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diarrhea" title="Diarrhea" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">diarrhea</a> and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thirst" title="Thirst" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">thirst</a>, typically after the intoxicating effect of the alcohol begins to wear off. While a hangover can be experienced at any time, generally speaking a hangover is experienced the morning after a night of heavy drinking. In addition to the physical symptoms, a hangover may also induce psychological symptoms including heightened feelings of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depression_(mood)" title="Depression (mood)" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">depression</a> and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anxiety" title="Anxiety" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(6, 69, 173); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; ">anxiety</a>.</p></div><p></p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><br /></p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><br /></p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; ">Also should include: </p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; ">- Stayed in all day in pyjamas</p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; ">- Ate 2 sweet potatoes and a 1/4 packet of Percy Piglets and Reversy Pigs all day as couldn't muster energy to go to the shop</p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; ">- Thoughts included: detaching head and replacing it with a new one, converting to Islam (doing it properly this time, not like when I tried for 2 months in 1995) and reeling in horror from "coaching" a random psychotic person in the bar after promising myself I wouldn't be evangelical</p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; ">- Unproductive actions included: 1) Doing nothing 2) Arguing with my cousin's friend on Facebook for dissing him (I don't even know this poor kid) 3) Writing this article 4) Staring at myself in horror in the mirror 5) Drinking countless cups of coffee to deal with lethargy 6) Learning more cockney rhyming slang (no idea why, I don't even know how to use it in the correct context anyway!) 6) Googling stuff about Ted Bundy and watching his interviews on youtube 7) Fear that I may actually be a sociopath 8) Looked at my psychology textbook (seriously did) and see that whilst I may have some latent traits, they have not yet manifested fully, thankfully 8) Listened to the same song (Pink Floyd, over and over and over again)</p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><br /></p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; ">Here's to a really productive day tomorrow. The past is the past and it's time to turn a new leaf.</p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><br /></p><p style="text-align: left; margin-top: 0.4em; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; ">xxxx</p></span>Garram Masalahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05897014567351823389noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1753757677442293015.post-26948094586125432162011-06-23T11:48:00.000-07:002011-06-23T12:33:19.255-07:00Spaghetti brain.. humour for deflection<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">I just completed the last day of my high performance coaching diploma and mindfulness training. </span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Would love to share some thoughts/ tools/ techniques on my blog in a series of postings but I have so much stuff going on in my head, that I thought I would do what I always do - use humour to deflect what I am really thinking.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Below are a list of jokes which are so bad, they are actually quite good: </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><ul><li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Shall we hire some consultants or shall we screw it up ourselves?</span></li></ul></div><div><ul><li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Boss: "I've decided to use humour in the office to ease tension, which is important in times of change (when we are downsizing)."</span></li></ul></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">"Knock Knock" </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Employee: "Who's there?"</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Boss: "Not you anymore!"</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><ul><li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">We are the unwilling, led by the unqualified are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. </span></li><li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">One day you will find yourself - and wish you hadn't. </span></li><li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">You are not yourself today. I noticed the improvement immediately. </span></li><li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">You have a striking personality. How long has it been on strike?</span></li><li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">His death won't be listed in the newspaper under obituaries. You'll find it under neighbourhood improvements. </span></li><li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">What is the centre of gravity? The letter "v".</span></li></ul><div>Ha ha! </div></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><div><br /></div></div>Garram Masalahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05897014567351823389noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1753757677442293015.post-82580000987185892492011-06-19T15:26:00.000-07:002011-07-13T02:09:09.747-07:00My love for the elderly<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhY8hFeIJ0tJ3ObeSgnEvae-tfZwITGG99aHLXwZhgrXDYCWQkWdGlMjZqT6SALgDyNGlxFBVRTIeEQYkZjbzpJtdjSmTNjvK3g8gpx6s-rQ2DBn_lCZK-2tygVdugQNtGDQjBqtK4sTxE/s1600/DSC_0279.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 211px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhY8hFeIJ0tJ3ObeSgnEvae-tfZwITGG99aHLXwZhgrXDYCWQkWdGlMjZqT6SALgDyNGlxFBVRTIeEQYkZjbzpJtdjSmTNjvK3g8gpx6s-rQ2DBn_lCZK-2tygVdugQNtGDQjBqtK4sTxE/s320/DSC_0279.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5620063340949960210" /></a><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">I have quite a few loves in life, but I really love the elderly. Not in a weird sort of way, but in a very real way. I love talking to and being with people who have really lived life and are well past the stage of trying to pretend to be something else, hopefully having reached a stage of true acceptance. A couple of wrinkles, lots of wisdom, lots of mistakes, lots of lessons learnt.</span><div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Perhaps growing up with my grandparents has fostered this in me. Perhaps I really am an old soul, I don't know. I am saddened when I see elderly people alone. I really am and without sounding patronising or like a granny-saver, I really think there is so much to learn from the elderly. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">For some reason, elderly people always smile at me in the street, maybe they think I'm weird or as someone has recently told me look really naive and could do with some love. I am joining this scheme in clapham where I get to cook a meal for a person who lives alone. I figured it would give me a chance to cook something nice once a week, and also a great chance to have a cuppa with someone. I remember visiting elderly relatives in South Africa, sitting around drinking tea and chatting. I wish I could still do that in London. I love the chatting-over-the-fence-stories. I think I could even give up Friday night shenanigans to join a knitting club! </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;">For my cynical friends reading this, the man in the photo was an old Greek man who just randomly stopped and started speaking to me in the street. Now, he was speaking in Greek, so no idea what he was actually saying, however, would sincerely appreciate it if you could just leave me with my 'see the best in humankind' belief, please!!! </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Not to wish my life away, but I am really looking forward to the days when I am retired, chatting to my grandkids, perhaps passing on wisdom too:) </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">I just need to start saving, as I so want to be the grandma with the vintage Chanel suit. It's gotta be done. </span></div></div>Garram Masalahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05897014567351823389noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1753757677442293015.post-30322052021685599262011-06-19T10:40:00.001-07:002011-06-19T11:01:21.554-07:00Happy Father's Day, dad<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDWERm8A3Sw8kSxvRyrLJPqXQ2_c_rmsVjmTE1waC0O9jc6K-m6EHRbNDAaZJLiboXGt8li5L7mQchFYxkkCO3mEF6A4R67Zzb-FLKswGnkdPvIUUVrbFqR7BwCLUZPqESO1kP1hNDPOM/s1600/Scan14.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 170px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDWERm8A3Sw8kSxvRyrLJPqXQ2_c_rmsVjmTE1waC0O9jc6K-m6EHRbNDAaZJLiboXGt8li5L7mQchFYxkkCO3mEF6A4R67Zzb-FLKswGnkdPvIUUVrbFqR7BwCLUZPqESO1kP1hNDPOM/s320/Scan14.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5619991374855226370" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br />I promised my dad that I would write his autobiography one day. Haven't quite got there, but perhaps this is a start. </span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Dad is extremely unconventional. The sort of father who never told me how to live my life - i.e. be conventional, get the degree to get the job to climb the ladder to be successful. No sir, dad is certainly not that kind of dad at all. Instead, he is the sort of man who has always told me to question (cheers for that, dad - you have created a monster and there I went, trying to be rebellious by becoming conventional instead!). </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">My dad spent his youth politically banned. He left school or rather bunked school for a year where he 'really' educated himself. Not the type of institutionalised education offered under the Apartheid regime, but real education according to him - Sarte, Fanon, Miller, Hemingway, Malcolm X, politically banned theatre. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">He questioned his own being, his consciousness and in so doing, joined the Black Consciousness Movement. He organised student protests, worked closely with Steve Biko and spent many years politically banned, either in prison where he was tortured physically and psychologically, and latter years under house arrest. He fought for his own sense of human dignity and those who were oppressed under Apartheid. He never did finish his education or get a real job, instead he always has and always will be a true freedom fighter. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Perhaps going down the well trodden path brings familiarity, security, a bit of money - does it really lead to fulfilment though?!</span></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Garram Masalahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05897014567351823389noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1753757677442293015.post-6313902210972022462011-06-19T08:52:00.001-07:002011-06-19T09:41:02.652-07:00So it begins...<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">I've been meaning to start a blog for ages, partly because I think creative expression in a world dominated by work harder, smarter, be your best, etc, doesn't create the conditions which necessitate meaningful introspection and also because I have reached a phase in my life where I am (annoyingly to my friends and family), questioning everything as well as simultaneously getting my neuron pathways in a massive twist! </span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">I have been reflecting relentlessly of late on my very hasty decision to make London my home, my sense of current lack of meaning and direction and also my own quest and attempt to create and in someway contribute meaningfully to society as well as to the people I hold dearest. My quest, for want of a better word has not really sparked anything soul-enlightening though, rather it has resulted in feelings of anxiety that I am not doing enough, being enough, loving enough. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">That said, I have not done too bad on paper. I moved to London by myself, after following my mum who hastily decided to move here. I worked full time, sometimes having 2 jobs at a time, working 7 days a week in order to save to fund my education and live in a very expensive city. I was in a long-term relationship which I thought would lead to marriage and I started working in HR. I was misguided. I am certainly not playing the "immigrant card", as I am so grateful for the experiences I have had, the wonderful selfless people who I have been lucky enough to meet and the opportunity to travel. I have been lucky that in spite of difficulties which we all encounter, I am blessed with a free mind and the opportunity to be authentic as I don't need to answer to anyone so to speak. I remind myself constantly of the generation before me, my dad being a prime example who have undergone soul-destroying oppression under Apartheid and still managed to be free psychologically and think for themselves. I have not suffered in that way, so am careful not to be self indulgent. That said, I still think that I owe it to myself to chart a new course of direction - still haven't figured out what though!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;">To calm the 'inner' voice which is silently telling me to write, create, perhaps complete my Masters in Psychology and work as a Community Psychologist, instead of a drone in the corporate world, I started researching the psychology of change and came across loads of stuff on 'positive' psychology. The cynic in me reeled at the thought of "believe in yourself", "think positive", let it pass.... as whilst I think there is most certainly a place for it, I can't get my head around attempts to influence people to "think positive". It just seems like social conditioning to me. I don't know. Whilst the intention is great, expecting people to think positively, when in fact there may be serious issues to be worked on, overcome and we all know that transformation is bloody difficult. There is nothing really "positive" in change - it brings with it doubt, charting into the waters of uncertainty, possible emotional loss and financial loss BUT I hear it also brings hope and living meaningfully, so there you go. Perhaps those sometimes annoying motivational gurus are right to a certain degree. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;">I came across this interesting video on positive thinking to prove my point. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5um8QWWRvo">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5um8QWWRvo</a></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;">So, here is my attempt to write a bit about the topics that interest me, challenging and learning to love my own demons and perhaps starting to look for ways in which I can give back to a world which has mostly been very good to me. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;">In the words of Kanye, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PsO6ZnUZI0g&feature=fvsr">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PsO6ZnUZI0g&feature=fvsr</a> (Ha Ha!!)</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;">Tash x</span></div>Garram Masalahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05897014567351823389noreply@blogger.com0